PLEASE HELP!!! WHATS WRONG WITH ME!!!?

My girlfriend says im obssessed with eminem! and she's threatining to leave me! but i think she's jelous because like eminem, i never knew my father niether he use to always cheat on my mom and beat her, and i can relate to what he's saying in his songs so when i have a crummy day i put them on, because i dont really have much else, so that stuff helps when im depressed, i even have a tattoo with his name across my chess... sometimes i even cut myself to see how much i bleed it's like adrenilline the pains just a sudden rush for me, and everything he says is real and i respect him because he TELLS IT! my girlfreinds jelous because i talk about him 24/7! but she dont know me like i know him no one does! she doesn't know what it was like for people like us growin up! please help me whats wrong with me! i feel like driving my car over a bridge and i dont know why!!!!!!